Pulp are the glaring omission from the 2025 Glastonbury lineup: number one album, blinding second single, thirty years since the headlined…

…but people are convinced they’re actually ‘Patchwork’, the band who don’t exist who have a prime slot.

This sleuthing has hit a problem though, as band member Candida Doyle said they weren’t wanted: “We wanted to, just because it’s the 30th anniversary and that kind of thing, and they weren’t interested. And then we were thinking maybe next year, and then they’re not doing it next year,” she told 6Music.

Disinformation?